When we feel something, we feel it deeply. And we express it with passion. We have tempers that needs to be controlled, enthusiasms that could use a governor, and sentiments that brings us to tears.
I am no different. But I am learning to display these tendencies privately.
This morning I woke up in a state of love, flying around the bathroom, making my little bowl of oatmeal, dancing in the shower to my morning wake-up songs and literally walking on the balls of my feet. I was imagining hugging people I haven't seen in a long time, both alive and gone, swinging them around with me to the air within the music of the morning.
As I walk out of the bathroom in this holding pattern of excitement, I recognize a couple of things right away: I share this residence with another person who is, and I wish to say this carefully, not a morning person.
I wish to repeat this for the proper emphasis: Not. A. Morning. Person.
I used belong to the "if you're happy and you know it, clap your hands" club. Now, it's closer to, "if you're happy and you know it, just be happy that you know it and be ok with that."
My actions of unbridled excitement and happiness need not to be seen. I didn't used to believe this. I settled on this idea recently. I don't need to be demonstrative for my feelings to have meaning to me.
And, when I really think about it, these feelings are for me. If I want to share that joy with you, I can choose to offer it on the wind that brushes your face, not the air from the end of a trumpet. If I can be joyful, that's great, but I want to flavor my effusive demeanor with consideration of the person that may think that energy is a little much.
This doesn't mean to suppress my joy or my happiness, not at all. In fact, I owe it to myself and others to keep the joy strong and active, but maybe with a little more mindfulness and meaning.Through smiles, eye contact, and an easy ability to laugh; by holding a door, saying "thank you" and meaning it, and stopping for just a half second to truly absorb the wonder of the morning sun and the first cup of coffee.
If you're joyful, others can feel it through the energy you hold. Joy can be peaceful, effusive, active, loud, expressive, warm, and even silent.
For today, I'm choosing to turn the dial down a little. The joy will still be there, I will still dance, still sing, still laugh like the Universe is waiting for me to understand the meaning of life...
...expressed quietly, with genuine confidence, of the peace that such joy can bring.